5 Books that changed my Mindset

Image by Sy Long

1. Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kyosaki

I first held this personal development book when I was introduced from a well-known multi-level-marketing Business. One of the speakers mentioned this book that changed her life so I bought the book right off the bat.

Lessons learned:

First, we all have our chance to get rich and get the life that we all dream about. It’s just a matter of changing what you’re doing.

Second, if you want to become rich, get a business. If you want to stay broke, get that corporate job.

It’s a bit harsh but it’s the reality.

Third, I learned about the differences of having a secured job from that of a Business. I also learned about the importance of acquiring assets versus liabilities.

So that’s primarily the reason why I joined that Multi-Level-Marketing Business but I didn’t earn because I knew I didnt’ do anything.

You might have heard that the only job you do is to refer someone and you’ll earn a commission if they’ll pay-in. It’s easier said than done. Don’t be ambitious! You need to work and need to do something in order to earn something so don’t blame that to your upline or to the company. I would blame myself for not doing much so I was not earning. I quit and gave it up. I was not prepared yet to be in that field so I wanted to focus on getting more life experiences and try other career fields like in customer service and sales.

2. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

So far, this is one of the best books I’ve ever read and so I still keep that book with me and read it again when I’ll get the chance.

Lessons Learned:

First, your thoughts and mindset are powerful tools to acquire that DESIRE you dream off.

Second, your IMAGINATION also creates a big role towards that desire through the power of your sub-concisous mind so use your brain wisely.

Third, having a CLEAR PLAN is useless without taking ACTIONS and PROCRASTINATION is your enemy to everything.

I still have a lot of things to say but I’ll stick with these three for now.

The next book is.

3. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey is a self-improvement book. It is written on Covey’s belief that the way we see the world is entirely based on our own PERCEPTIONS. In order to change a given situation, we must change ourselves, and in order to change ourselves, we must be able to change our perceptions.

Lessons learned:

First, In everything we do, we should begin with the end in mind. Start with a clear destination. That way, we can make sure the steps we’re taking are in the right direction.

Second, in order to manage ourselves effectively, we must put first things first. We must have the discipline to prioritize our day-to-day actions based on what is most important, not what is most urgent.

Third, to be able to maintain the discipline and the focus to stay on track toward our goals, we need to have the willpower to do something when we don’t want to do it. We need to act according to our values rather than our desires at any given moment.

The challenge is not to manage time, but to manage ourselves. — Stephen Covey

Take a look at the 4 Quadrants and ask yourself. What am I doing and in which Quadrant do I belong?

So you might be asking?

In which quadrant should we FOCUS on?

We should put more attention in Quadrant 2, the things that are important and not urgent. Now, it’s your time to assess yourself and consider the things that is affecting your productivity.

Last and foremost, LISTENING should be mastered.

According to Stephen, we must build the skill of listening empathically which is based on characters that inspires openness and trust.

After all, Covey points out, communication experts estimate that:

  • 10% of our communication is represented by our words
  • 30% is represented by our sounds
  • 60% is represented by our body language

Remember that when we listen, we tend to respond in one of these four ways:

1. Evaluate: Agree or disagree with what is said

2. Probe: Ask questions from our own frame of reference

3. Advise: Give counsel based on our own experience

4. Interpret: Try to figure out the person’s motives and behavior based on our own motives and behavior

So let’s practice the habit of listening emphatically.

4. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

I would say, this is the book that brought me back into my love of reading. One time, my student gave me this book as a present. I will never forget that moment because first, it’s my first time to receive a book as a present in my entire life. Second, she was my student and so I find it special. It’s that simple.

It took me months to finish reading that book though, I remember one time when my student reminded me if I finished the book already. Thanks to her, I finished it.

So here are some of the lessons I learned:

1. Do Not Criticize, Condemn or Complain

According to Cargenie, “Any fool can criticize, condemn or complain- and most fools do.” He continues on to say that it takes character and self-control to be forgiving, this discipline will save you and your relationships with people.

2. Remember People’s Names

Remembering people’s names when you meet them is difficult. You casually meet a lot of people so it’s challenging, but if you can train yourself to remember people’s names, it makes them feel special and important.

“Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.”

So this is so challenging for me especially when remembering my students’ names in Vietnamese but after practicing this, I have gained more respect and trust from my students.

3. Be Genuinely Interested In Other People

Remembering a person’s name, asking them questions that encourage them to talk about themselves so you discover their interests and passions are what make people believe you like them, so they in turn like you.

Here’s one of my favorite quotes,

“You make more friends in two months by becoming genuinely interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” If you break it down, you should listen 75% and only speak 25% of the time.

4. Be Quick To Acknowledge Your Own Mistakes

As an Educator, I heard some stories from my colleagues about them afraid of making mistakes because we think we are teachers and we are role models so in my point of view, we should start changing our mindset, after all, we are just human beings and that we don’t know everything. We should accept mistakes instead and learn from it.

Nothing will make people less defensive and more agreeable than you being humble and reasonable enough to admit your own mistakes. Having strong and stable personal and professional relationships relies on you taking responsibility for your actions, especially your mistakes. Nothing will help end tension or a disagreement more than a simple acknowledgment and apology on your part.

5. Make People Feel Important

Smiling, knowing people’s names, praising people, making an effort to know their interests and chat about them make people feel much more important. That is the underlying point of all of the above principles. If you make people feel important, how you walk through the world will be an exponentially more pleasant and incredible experience.

And the final book is

5. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

Eckhart indicates that the present moment is all that we have. We are so caught up in our daily tasks to notice the brief moments of life. According to this author, there is no future or past. There is only memory. The things that happened in the past give us an identity and the future is simply full of promise. Promise can take the form of fulfillment, salvation or deliverance. These are intangible and therefore simply illusions. One of the most common sayings is that time is precious. Actually, it is also simply an illusion. The factor that we consider precious is not the time but the point in that time. Eckhart calls it the Now and encourages us to stop focusing on the future or the past and focus on the Now. After all, the most precious thing in the world is the present moment.

Lessons learned:

First, focus on the present and don’t think too much about the future.

Recently, I have been overthinking and overanalyzing things and I ended up not doing anything at all and that has killed my productivity but it is also imperative that you’re doing things that are aligned in your future.

Second, Mindfullness and Meditation can help you practice the habit of focusing at the present.

According to research, MINDFULLNESS and MEDITATION can help us increase our ability to regulate emotions, decrease stress, anxiety and depression. As we become more present in our lives and in relation to others, it can help us to make better decisions, to manage our emotions and to be more fully engaged in life.

Final Thoughts

We are all caught up with so many distractions in our lives so we should learn to pay attention to things that are inline with our values and prioritise things that are much more important to us.

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Julian Dalignoc Jr.

Julian Dalignoc Jr.

Your English Guro (Teacher) and writes about Communication, Marketing and Personal Development.